Act Like Men

Men, dads, grandpa’s you are the number one influence in the life of your children, your wife, and other young men you encounter. They have gathered together enough statistical evidence over the last 20-30 years that tells us that 80% of our children would go to church and follow Christ if the father would take the initiative and lead the way spiritually in their home. And the opposite is true. If the dad doesn’t take the initiative only 20% of our children would go to church and/or follow Christ. In other words they would see no need for the church or Christ in their life.

To put this in simpler terms, if dads not doing it, it is more than likely that the kids are not going to do it. If the dad is absent in spiritual things, our kids will more than likely will not be. I am not saying moms  don’t have a spiritual influence in the life of their children – but statistics are telling us you are second in line to your spouse. Obviously there are exceptions. But there aren’t very many. We are learning that there is something about those scriptures that say, “men are to be the spiritual leaders in their homes.” I know it not very politically correct to say that in the day and age in which we live, but I am betting on it that most moms and grandmas desire their husbands to take the spiritual lead in their homes (am I right ladies?).

A lot of men have passed off their responsibility for being the spiritual leader in their home to their spouse. According to the scriptures, that is not the way God had intended it to be! God needs men. God needs dads, God needs grandpa’s to take the spiritual initiative. God needs men who after God’s own heart! 

There is an even deeper issue going where we are failing our kids – many kids don’t even have a dad living at home. In 1960 – 82.5% of children lived with lived with a dad and mom in the home. 17.5% of children lived apart from their biological father. In 1970 – 77.6% of children lived with a dad and mom in the home. 22.4% lived apart from the biological father. In 1980 – 67.8% of children lived with a dad and mom in the home. 32.2% lived apart from their biological father. In 1990 – 61.7% of children lived with a dad and mom in the home. 38.3% lived apart from their biological father. This statistics doesn’t measure the number of dads who lived at home and weren’t emotionally, physically, or spiritually there for their kids. You could arguably equate these statistics with the decaying of the moral fabric in our society to the lack of men leading in their homes, the continued rise of single parent families, and the creation of the Caitlyn Jenners in our world – young boys/girls who are confused about their gender identity.

Men, dads, and grandpa’s, God has given you (according to the scriptures) this influence. He has given you this role to carry out in the life of your family and the other places of influence that you have. The scriptures point to the importance of the father’s role in the life of their kids.

Proverbs 17:6 says, “the glory of sons is their father.”

Men play a significant role in the life of their children.

• You can destroy them or give them life.
• You can discourage them or push them along.
• You can defeat them or give them dreams.

That is the power God has given you in the life of a child and in your home. Pretty scary isn’t it?

In meeting with young fathers through the week I encourage them to step up in their homes and be the leader God has called them to be. In meeting with young couples, I encourage the groom to be the spiritual leader in their home. What I am learning first hand is that  dad’s and grandpa’s are relinquishing their role and influence that God has given them. In some cases they also abuse this influence.

Yes, men are to provide for our families, be men of integrity,  take care of our homes and protect our kids/ wives, and love our wives. But first and foremost, we are to “seek him earnestly.” (Heb. 11:6) This is the greatest gift we can give to our spouse and kids.

I Corinthians 16:13-14 gives us this challenge:

Be alert, stand firm in the faith, act like a man, be strong. Your every action must be done in love.

God has designed men to be courageous and to be godly examples in our homes and in our community. God has designed men to love and serve through controlled strength. He has designed men to stand to stand firm in the faith when waves crash and the beach erodes around us and around those we are called to lead, love, and protect. He designed them to build the lives of those we are responsible for on the bedrock that is Christ.

This can’t happen unless our own lives are founded on Christ. God wants men to do what men are designed to do! It starts with a relationship with Christ.

Then we need to start to:

Look upward.

God has called us first of all to be His worshipers – to hunger and thirst after Him. We hunger and thirst for a lot of things But nothing on this side of heaven will satisfy the longing in our heart. We try to satisfy the longing of heart with toys and stuff but those things always come up short and never fully satisfy. In fact they leave us longing for more money, more stuff, or more hours at work.

Psalm 73:25 – tell us, “I desire you more than anything on earth”

To desire Him more than your stuff will satisfy the longing in your heart because it is Him we are longing for in the first place. We just fill this desire with other things hoping they satisfy but deep down we know that they can only provide a temporary fix.

The psalmist (who is a guy) also says, “As the deer pants for water so my soul thirst for you.” This doesn’t appear to be a very manly thing to do but these psalms were written by men. It is the greatest thing you can do for your wife and kids, because when you hunger and thirst for him,  he changes you from the inside out and who gets the benefit. Our wife and kids.

Look Inward

This is tough for men to do (except if there is a fishing pole or fire involved). When you look upward it leads to an inward look. As soon as Isaiah saw the glory of the Lord (looked upward), he immediately became aware of his own sinfulness. It was the same with Job, Peter and John (Job 42:5,6; Lk. 5:8;Re. 1:17).

 2 Corinthians remind us, Examine yourselves to see if your faith is genuine. Test yourselves. Surely you know that Jesus Christ is among you; if not, you have failed the test of genuine faith.

Psalm 46:10 says, “Be still (take a look inward), and know that I am God!”

In other words, when you become aware of His presence in your life you begin to realize how much you are not like Christ. When we become aware of our own shortcomings and how much we fall short of the glory of God – you are humbled and see your need for forgiveness and your need for God.

All throughout the scripture men were humbled. Jonah who got stuck in the belly of big fish, preached the shortest sermon ever recorded and a whole nation turned to God. Zacchaeus, the wee little man, had Jesus in his home. When Jesus left he was paying back everything four times the amount he cheated everybody.The pattern continues through the OT/NT – men meet Jesus, they talk, they were humbled. 

When you look upward and inward it leads to

Looking outward.

When you realize how much God has blessed you and forgiven you, you become a blessing to others. Since God has forgiven you so much, you forgive all who have harmed you. Since God has been so good to you he makes you aware of the needs of others around you. He who understands he has received freely from God, gives freely to others.He doesn’t seek any gain from others. Serving others becomes a way of life.
I Corinthians 16:13-14  reminds us that we to:

Be alert – Look for opportunities to be a blessing to your family and your community.

Stand firm in the faith – Never relinquish the spiritual leadership that you have in your home. Never give up on seeking God with all your hear, mind, and soul.

Be strong – This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9

Understand that God is with you wherever you go. In issues of integrity – he is with your wherever you go.. In issues of moral purity – he is with you wherever you go. In difficult decisions – he is with you wherever you go. In the midst of financial crisis – he is with you wherever you go. In days of uncertainties and your are not sure what to do – he is with you wherever you go.

And in everything you do – let every action be done in love. In other words, act like men who understands how much God loves them and return that love to your kids, your wife, and to those that know you.

We are called to look upward, inward, and outward. If we only look upward – that man would live an unrealistic life. He would be so heavenly-minded that he would be of no use here on earth. These kind of men miss the world around them. If you only look inward – that man would be depressed and discouraged most of the time. They think they are the only who falls short of the glory of God. They do things out of guilt rather than the glory of God. If you only look outward – that man’s work becomes shallow and self-serving.

To be strong and alert and stand firm in the faith we need to look upward, inward, and outward.

Men, be spiritual leaders in your homes.

Men, be a spiritual influence on the generation coming behind you.

Men, be who God designed you to be in issues of integrity, morality, and spirituality.

Men, examine yourself and let your faith be genuine.